busted...

i bought an ibook yesterday!!!! yeah me!!!! and i got a free ipod with it cause i'm a student...bad ass, right?  right.  so i was leaving the apple store, which is always exciting, it's so pretty in there, all white and clean and full of rich people.  but yesterday was especially pleasing, because i actually bought something.  usually i leave feeling depressed, all sad on the inside because the car i drive is equal in value to the computer i really want...so i curse my parents for not having a trust fund with  my name on it and i curse my bloody passion for not leading me into law or medicine and i walk away.  feeling cold and lonely.  and i whisper to the heavy wind 'someday...'

and that someday was yesterday. 

***applause***

and it is at this moment that i would like to officially thank george w. bush.  thanks, dub-ya!  you're one helluva guy.  those student loans are great for buying technological equipment.  and all this time i thought you didn't care about me.  i thought all you cared about was taking away my right to choose and my right to listen to howie stern every morning.  i thought you were selfish for bringing jesus back to the white house.  then i remembered, wait! jesus likes to share.  remember that fish story?  how he fed 500 people with that one little filet?  well, if we lived back in the bible days--IMAGINE!!!!--i just want you to know that i'd a been one of them people who got fed.   and you, you woulda been the son of god.  but instead of a filet, you woulda fed me an apple.  and that's good fiber.  wait...if you fed me an apple, wouldn't that make you lucifer?  and me the seductive eve?  nevermind...anyhow,  thanks, georgie!  thanks a ton.

so after i dropped entirely too much captial on the most beautiful notebook ever, me and shari skipped to my car.  i was swinging my new laptop around, considering making out with it, that's how much i love it.  and we get to my car and i notice a flyer tucked beneath the driver's side windsheild wiper.  (this is a huge pet peeve of mine.  don't street teams get that we, consumers, don't read your flyers?  we don't.  we throw them on the ground; we use them for emergency napkins; we toss them inside and  junk up our back seats; and we--rather me in this case--put them under the wipers of the car next to us.

atleast that's what i did: i swiftly yanked it from my territory and popped it under the bmw to my immediate left. 

BAM! BANG! BAM! BANG! BAM!

i jumped.

a muffled threat began to reverbrate from inside the beamer..."hey! don't put that shit on my car!  what the hell's wrong with you!?!?!"

"oh...oh no....so sorry...."  i retrieved the flyer and felt my cheeks flush.  people walking by were staring.  i looked towards shari for support, all deer in the headlights like, and found shari doing what any loyal freind should do in such a moment: pointing at me while laughing wildly.  i put my hands up and ducked through an exaggerated apology to the man inside his fancy car talking on his fancy cellphone with his fancy earpeice.

i broke out,  got in my car as fast i could and couldn't quit laughing for ten minutes.

i used to be so smooth, so outlaw...and now...

i got busted.

and hard.

so hard i felt a fool.

oh well, i really don't care.  you know why? cause i have a brand new laptop!!!!!  busted shmusted.  buying expensive things makes you feel good about yourself, like you're better than others.  so fuck that dude.  yeah.  word.

Comments

[jake]

This absolutely made my day.

Congratulations! I am sure the ibook and the ipod will change your life as it has for so many people. Microsoft is the devil.

Be sure to download Neo OpenOffice - its just like Microsoft office only it's free. I'll look for it on the internets and send it to you.

Okay call me if you get bored.

Miss you more than Saturday morning cartoons (when they were good) and cereal.

[shari]

i'm glad you got your computer cause now we can i.m. each other while we sit together at coffee shops and it will look like we are doing important work.

oh and there is nothing more enjoyable than laughing at your friends public disgraces . you taught me that a long time ago...

[Risa]

I love your blog. You are quite the little blogger. Love you.